Now, let me pause here by saying that my sis is a workhorse. She does IT ALL. She is the ultimate haus frau and never shies from a project, big or small and always gives 100% to her family, friends, and community. She puts MY organizational skills (hardly imaginable, I know....) to shame! (see previous post about Flossy and her re-org'd kitchen). I'd also say she is pretty smart. She has a master's degree in education. Are you glowing right now, dear sis?
Sooooooooooooooo, was I ever surprised when she decided/was heavily pressured into getting a PUPPY. WTF? WTF? WTF?
Here's the funny thing......she said the exact same thing on day three of puppyville.
What Have I Done?
Here is the timeline (give or take a few days):
Week 1 - Why did I want/give into/subject myself to yet another needy being that ultimately I am responsible for? She was anxiety filled, pit in her stomach....omg, I made a big f*@!!#ing mistake. She thinks, cleverly, hmmmmmmm....with a baby, you can't return it to the breeder. With a dog.....YOU CAN. Yes! That's the answer! Except...four sets of eyes hold onto large "puppy dog" tears (pun intended) as they beg to keep dog. Damn.......guilt.
Week 2- Puppy lunch intervention held by friends. Manuals, tools, advice and 'suck it up lady you got the dog' are dispensed. A glass of wine helped too. Still want to return dog.
Week 3 - husband willing to pay anything, anything, ANYTHING to shut up anxiety ridden wife, semi-hysterical 11 year old and non-stop yapping/pooping puppy. Training will be consulted asap.
Week 3 - eventual and painful realization that said puppy ain't going anywhere. He officially becomes named 'Murphy' and part of the family. Yet another one mommy has to take on the chin for the sake of her family. Pit remains in stomach, but made better by two glasses of wine.
Week 4 - puppy has first visit with vet. Puppy ear infection (never mind the kid on the inhaler, the kid with a new mouth appliance that needs to be cranked nightly, the kid with a project due, and the kid with the skin infection. Husband, is of course, away.) and needs frequent ear drops.
Week 5 - puppy settles in by systematically pooping on every single rug in house. Dogologist is immediately called in! $75 an hour. Slight chance that puppy may be "a tough one to train." Undaunted, sister continues on the fight. She got four kids potty trained by age 3 and by god, this little beast WILL NOT take her down.
Week 6 - I talk with sister as she peruses the aisle of Target. "Squeeeak, squeeak, squeek." "What's that noise????" I ask. "Oh, it's a toy for Murphy".
Stick a fork in her, she's all done.
4 comments:
Dogologist recommended keeping lil doggie on a leash while inside to curtail indoor toileting - tonight I made dinner/supervised homework/packed lunches/cleaned kitchen with a puppy hooked to my belt loop. What fun!! (blushed at your descrip. of me sis)
Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha! I can just picture it! This is why I WILL NOT get a dog. There will be no woofy woof in this house. Let me know how it goes being attached to the Murphy. Jeez, does the fun ever end?
WTF??? How DOES she do it?! I'm ripping my hair out with ONE kid, and 2 already-trained dogs. Does she give lessons???
Hi Kate - all I can tell you is she is mental.
OK - all kidding aside. The first time you have a child....you are like....is this a joke? Talk about the shock of your life! I say have a good cry and mourn your old life. It's gone for awhile (see mommy sabbatical blog for a ray of light). BUT...here is the good news. It gets sooooo much easier. No lie! They get more independent and scheduled and you can resume some semblance of normalcy. Right around that time you might decide "hey, lets do this again!" That's what happened to me x 3. Glad for it though. It was crazy....but if I can do it, anyone can! You are in the trenches girl, just live hour to hour! Peace!
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