Okay, file this under TMI, but I'd like to know how people squeeze in sex without their kiddoes being aware of it? Mr. Flossy and I just had a quickie this morning, and thankfully the kids were both sound asleep, but on a previous morning we finished only to have our nearly 10-year old anxiously call out "Daddy are YOU OKAY???" He thought there was something wrong with MY HUSBAND'S BREATHING! We assured him that Daddy had a little stomach ache, which accounted for the groaning and he seemed to buy it.
Most nights, the kids fight us about going to sleep. Even on a good night, the older one might still be awake until 10 p.m. By that time, I am snoozing myself and GOD HELP MR. FLOSSY IF HE WAKES ME UP FROM A SOUND SLEEP TO HAVE SEX! Sorry, but has anyone seen one of those horror movies when a perfectly normal person suddenly morphs into a hideous demon? Yeah, that's me being woken up for SEX!
Luckily for the husband and I, God invented America's Funniest Home Videos. On Sunday nights from 7-8, our kids are GLUED to the television down in the playroom. We can hear their screams of laughter through the floor as people on t.v. get nailed in the balls, fly off a skateboard or accidentally run over their cat with the lawnmower (oops!). Conversely, they cannot hear our screams of pleasure through the floor (okay, maybe not SCREAMS, but still...).
The only downside to this arrangement is when AFV is pre-empted due to a very special two-hour Extreme Makeover Home Edition.
Damn that Ty Pennington!
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4 comments:
I will NEVER watch AFV with innocence again!!!
FYI, This Sunday the chose to watch Pokemon, the Rise of Darkrai (Dark Rye???) We actually had time to go around TWICE!
TMI, I know.
Sounds like you guys are $^@#&ing like rabbits over there! I thought it was once a month at best for you.
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