Why do I DO THIS to myself?

I turned 38.  Whooopee!  I celebrated in several ways.  First, my girlfriends in the neighborhood had a small gathering in honor of two of us who had September birthdays.  Couple glasses of wine...not a big deal.

Second, small family party with my husband and children.  One glass of wine.  No problem.

Third, a dinner party with some close friends.   Four margaritas later and I am ALL DONE.  Flash forward to today.......me very sicky.  Me not happy-o.  Me yucky.

I am 38 years old darn it!  I should know better!  You cannot weigh 110 pounds and drink a shit load of tequila and not feel it the next day.  Here is the difference between me at 28 and me at 38.  Me at 28 - drink a lot, feel sick the next day until about 4Pm...have an italian sub and all is well.  Me at 38 - drink a lot, feel so sick all day long, incredibly nauseous, sleep on and off, eat nothing, lay on couch like a loser.  The facts are in ladies and gents....it hits you a LOT harder the older you get.  This being said......I am ALL DONE.  It's just not worth it.....and I am not being a good example for my kids.  My 11 year old can and will figure it out.  What's that gonna be like..... me lecturing her on the evils of drinking and there I am hanging hard?  Common sense says.....it doesn't work.  You gotta practice what you preach.   So here it is world.....it's over for me.  I am done on the booze train....last stop...38.  A glass of wine, one beer, ok.    Anything else....slap me upside the head and slap it out of my hand.  Remind me....It is ok to only have none/one alcoholic drink and still be fun!  

There....now I can go puke.  

The Great Schlep

HAPPY BIRTHDAY FITFREAK!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR FITFREAK...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Love, Flossy

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Milk......it does a body good.

Here is my WTF moment for the week.   Did you hear that PETA sent a letter to Ben & Jerry's Ice Cream asking them to replace Cow's Milk with Human Breast Milk?  Yeah....that's right....human breast milk.  Can you imagine anything more disgusting that eating a pint of Cherry Garcia flavored with Tammy from Chicago's boob milk?  Gee Tammy....did you have a BURRITO before you pumped?  Or how about Phish Food with just a slight taste of Minestrone?  Or Wow, this peanut butter cup is making me feel F-I-N-E....did someone in Florida have too many Margarita's?  Yummmmmmmm.  

Can you imagine how Ben & Jerry's would make this work?  Would mothers everywhere send in their milk and get paid?  Or better yet....would there be a giant milking room where women could come in, put their feet up, knit, chat, listen to an ipod or watch TV while being milked?

Never mind how completely disgusting and germy it is to think of eating someone's BREAST MILK.  What shocked me the most was that these a-holes actually think this is a really good idea!  AND...they think that the cows are being hurt when they get their milk pumped out.  Hey PETA......have you ever had a breast pump squeezing the hell out of your boob?  Let me tell you.....I HAVE and IT HURTS LIKE HELL.  I certainly could relate to the cow when I had this contraption on....I felt a certain kinship....but I am a HUMAN and they are a COW and for as long as life has been around we have been using cow's milk and they don't really seem to mind.  The baby cows get their fare share of milk too...so all around it's a happy milk world.  

PETA is a serious organization....one that I actually believe in too...I don't like seeing baby seals getting clubbed for their soft pelts or elephants shot dead for their ivory tusks...but they have made absolute idiots of themselves with this one.  Save the breast milk for the ones who need it the most........HUMAN BABIES.